Cowboy jokes

[R Severe]

Thought I'd tell a story a customer of mine just related to me.
This young man is on a family ranch in central Nevada and has been waiting for me to ship his new saddle for over a year & a half.

I sent the saddle and also a email letting him know to watch for it. Well he was out riding when ups dropped it by, and his father in law happened to be home.
Daddy in law carefully removed his new saddle from the box and replaced it with a english saddle and taped her back up.

When the young man got in, his wife informed him he had a package. He told me when he seen the english saddle, he just couldn't think strait, all he could do was stare. Daddy in law kept prompting him, is that what you ordered, you otta call that guy.

He said he was heading to the phone when they showed him his new saddle
I was thinking, I'm glad he didn't make that call. The trick would have caught two of us

[lion hunter]

Was it a pink english saddle.

[Mike Leonard]

[BlacktailStalker]

[R Severe]

Good one Mike
I do think folks who work in the outdoors have a great sense of whats funny ( a little sick maybe)
It's the same in the logging outfits or construction. I learned early to be ready to run and don't play a joke on a guy that can run faster than you.

I do remember a buddy in a loggin outfit that started throwing rocks when I started pulling away from him, hard to run and dodge rocks at the same time

[Melanie Hampton]

[Buddyw]

[R Severe]

Good one Buddy

Speaking of wives, mine almost killed me then divorced me over putting a baby critter in the pickup with her.
We were heading to town early one morning and a family of badgers crossed the road in front of us. I stopped, got out and walked over to the hole they were trying to crowd into.
They were doin good, except one. He wouln't go in, fraid to take his eyes off me long enough. He'd growl like a grizzly and make a run at my boot trying his best to bluff me out. Little guy was bout 15" long or so but sounded much bigger.
When he made a dive for my boot next I was ready. I got the biggest handfull of fur I could gather in my hand, right behind his head. Worked great, I picked him up and walked over to the pickup to show my bride of one month.

I stopped at the drivers door, holding it up for her to see. She was sitting there with her mouth open and big eyes just not sure if this was good or not. I just couldn't help myself, I dropped it in the window.
To this day I don't know what made me do it, I figured Cindy would head out the other door.

Nope, the two pound grizzly hit the floor and headed for her side. She stuck her feet in the dash, arched her back off the back of the seat and became part of the headliner. I still haven't figured out how she did it but with the badger on the floor on her side she came clear across the pickup and out the same window the badger went in. All this time there was a lot of noise inside that cab.
By the time her feet hit the pavement I was bent over laughing so hard I could barely stand. This gave my bride the chance to land several punches that I could not even begin to ward off.

When Cindy got tired of swinging I had to figure out how to get that poor lil badger outta the wiring under the dash. Good thing wiring is color coded, I had a little splicing to do later.

I had to apologize to both of them for the tramma, the badger seem to accept it cause I could keep a strait face with him.

[Eric Muff]

I hunted wiyh a buddy that was always worried about his truck getting broken into while away on a Cougar track,he'd always be in a rush to leave the tree and get back to the truck so he could keep it safe.We got tired of the deal so one day,knowing where he hid his keys,we pulled a dirty trick.We opened the drivers side electric window full open and poured some broken glass from a wrecked car onto the seat,locked her back up and waited for a distress call on the radio.Well it came and was he bent,"somebody broke out the window"!We he had no choice but to drive the 18 miles back to town with no window at -25 degrees!
He went to the glass shop the next day still mad as a cut cat and they really had a laugh.
Doesn't whine anymore!One day though.....................

[budmandan]

A good trick we have had alot of fun with is wiring an old car horn to the directional wire of the trailer light connector of a buddies truck. It is easy to do. Get an old car horn. Wire up the ground wire and one of the directional wires to a pigtail with the right trailerlight connector. Hook it to the trucks trailer light connector and zip tie the horn under the truck. Every time they step on the brake or turn on the directional the horn honks! When the poor unsuspecting buddy is sitting in the cab of the truck they just can't seem to figure out why there truck is making this god awful noise lol. It helps to throw a little doubt into them earlier in the day about a weird noise coming from there truck. They will be thinking big $$$ in repairs instead of a joke had by there "friends"

Have fun, Dan

[R Severe]

Good ones guys

I had a old trapper tell me about some of the best honey in the world when I was a kid. I was trying to get trapping secrets pryed outta him when I was about 14.
In the prosses of telling me about a honey based lure, he stopped and told me about the best honey.
He said that the yellow jacket that have ground nests have a little ball of honey down there thats the sweetest honey in the world, then just stopped talking.

I asked him "well how do you get it" Boy that got him all fired up.

He leaned forward and explained all how to go about it.
First he said get you some leather gloves. When you spot the bee's put them on and slip up to the nest real quiet like. He said get you a little pebble that will fit down the hole and drop it in.

Then right quick get your hands in the clapping position on each side of the hole. When you see the first bee start outta that hole just start clapping as fast as you can, when no more come out, don't quit as there's the queen just waiting for you to stop. He said she would make a try for you in a couple minutes so don't stop.

When you get the queen he said you could careflly dig the nest out and get that ball of honey.

Thank the man above I never found a nest untill I figured out he was the kinda guy that lived for a good joke

[Dan V]

A large ranch I worked on in AZ was 1,200 square miles and really spread out. The ranch was spilt into several different camps. Each camp had it's own country and had corrals and a bunk house or a house for the camp man.

There was about 4 of us at the time living at Rose Well. The next camp over was Keeseeha and the cowboy at that camp was by himself. Keeseeha was about 15-20 miles away.

In the saddle house at Keeseeha was an old deep freezer used to store grain (they are mouse proof). Well, a couple of us snuck over there early in the morning while it was still dark. We hid in the saddle house with 1 guy in the deep freeze.

Here comes Brad....thinking he is the only human for miles and walks out to the saddle house. When he opened the freezer to get some grain for the horses, the guy in the freezer grabbed him and started to pull him in! The other guy who was hiding with me and I rushed up behind him and started to push him into the freezer. The thing about Brad was that he was one of those guys who was easy to scare..........we probably took a couple of years off his life that morning.