Welll excussssse us Andie!

Ya ever think it strange that your ol' lady always asks if you washed your hands after you took a leak, but doesn't ask if you washed "IT" before she eats it?

I woke up this morning with the feel of my sweet wife's arm under my neck, but it felt kinda weird. It was cold and stiff. Figured I'd cut the circulation off , so I rolled over to give her a good morning kiss and dam, it looked like a varmint had come in the middle of the night and chewed her arm ...

Sow and Ye shall reap !

Forest
Send that to congress!

Actually, they were high fiving.

???????

Thought you was a Texan Big Blue. It'supposed to read pickup truck!

He ain't from around here!

Amen, brother.

An SAPD buddy was visiting Corpus recently and got pulled over. He flashed his badge but the CCPD officer refused to acknowledge it. The very next week my buddy was working I-37 North and pulled over a speeder and yes, God has a sense of humor! It was my buddy's brother officer from CC. He begged ...

My EX was bitchin one evening about needing to get a boob job, which we really couldn't afford at the time. So I told her to try rubbing her boobs with toilet paper. She asked how that was suppossed to help grow larger breasts and I said to look what it did for your butt.

Years ago they tried to start up a black Miss America pageant .
They failed to get a representative from I da ho.

This IS a classic! Had to email this to my brother down in Miami.
The bitch across the street parked her car in front of my brother's business gate blocking access to his parking lot. Being a good guy he went over and asked her to please remove her car, to which she told him to "(beep) off , she ...

Howdy y'all!
Another damned Texas cowpoke here.
As a pup we coon hunted every weekend possible at our place in the Texas hill country a few miles from Kerrville. During high school I graduated to Texas cats and Az. lions and other cats in the Aravaipa. Bear in Colorado and W. Virginia. Before my LE ...